Archive for the ‘News’ Category

Hotdog Bloggers Must Be Happy Dogdroids

December 1, 2010


So the Oscar Meyer Wienermobile had a traumatic mishap in Wisconsin.  One of the twenty-somethings who was hired temporarily as a one-year hotdogger thought she was in reverse when she lurched forward and crashed into a house’s garage door and upper deck.  Oops.

I took note at all the varied news reports of the incident and had to laugh.  The American media loves these “Man Bites Dog” stories.  I decided to take it one step further and seek out Oscar Meyer Wienermobile information off the Krafts Food website and, lo and behold, what did I discover?

The corporate promotions department of the famous meatpacking plant hires cheerful, zany, smiling people to work as goodwill ambassadors for their famed frankfurter adventures. These over-zealous college grads, who obviously grew up worshipping Barney The Dinosaur, use every lame hotdog pun or reference imagineable to mankind.  “Ketchup with you later…” “Relish the opportunity…”  “Check out our buns and say hello…”  You name it. They even identify themselves with ridiculously obnoxious names like Lil Links Laura, C. Melton Cheddar, Torey Toppings, and Dijon John. The groans are practically non-stop.

No wonder it’s such a joy when the vehicle backfires and makes national headlines. However, it wasn’t all that dramatic as the news wanted it to be. The police said the unidentified female driver was trying to turn the Wienermobile around in the driveway and thought she was moving in reverse but she instead went forward and hit the home.

Wish I knew who it was… Leadfoot Lisa perhaps?  Who’s in a pickle now?


Has America stopped looking for Usama bin Laden?

March 18, 2010


After September 11th, 2001, Usama bin Laden became public enemy number one and we were determined to hunt him down and bring him to justice for claiming responsibility to the tragic terrorist attacks on America.

He remains on the FBI’s Ten Mosted Wanted Fugitives list and Most Wanted Terrorist list.

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Controversial documentary filmmaker Michael Moore, in one of his movies, suggested that Usama bin Laden had huge American energy business ties, involving then-President George W. Bush.  Wouldn’t that create a total conflict of interest?

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On a September 23rd, 2006, posting by the Free Republic, the report of Usama bin Laden’s alleged death was announced and noted as the source was the Lorraine daily newspaper, L’Est republicain. Saudi police sought to confirm this finding but no further documentation was provided.

The original article was written in French but put through a web translator and fixed up as best as possible.  A comment to the posting claims he died in Tora Bora in 2001 but is there hasn’t been any proof to that rumor.

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In March 2009, the New York Daily News website speculated that Usama bin Laden was in Chitral, a sealed-off Pakistani paradise. The area is reported to have “stunning peaks and deep valleys” which implies a safe and secure hideaway.

In the article, CIA Director Leon Panetta tells Congress he asks “every day” where Bin Laden is hiding.  What good is that doing?

At the bottom of the page, there is a reader’s survey about the so-called continued manhunt:

(   )  Yes – We’re close to tracking him down.

(   )   No – We haven’t found him yet after more than 7 years.  He’ll keep eluding us.
(   )   Someone will capture him eventually, but probably not the U.S.

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What is the correct spelling of his name anyway?  Is it Usama bin Laden or Osama bin Laden?  Maybe we need to come to a consensus in order to find him.

Is America even still trying?

The Man Who Was The News

July 18, 2009


Like Mel Blanc’s eulogy, all that’s needed is an empty microphone.